Thursday, May 28, 2009

Siti Nur Lisa...My Princess

Suddenly, my thought to Siti Nurlisa came accross my mind...I don't know why...

It seems like yesterday you left us and I has been quite sometime since our last visit...to your home...

I can still remember how the feeling was when "Mama" told me that she's pregnant. All the preparation to welcome you was done...with love all around...



I've not missed talking to you every night when times permit...I can feel your elbow...disturbing "Mama". Not comfortable huh in there.

Everything had gone smoothly...until the eight months of "Mama" pregnancy. I was too busy working...and I've ignored her complaint that she was not feeling well. She went alone that day to do her check up.

"Mama" complaint about her headache...and thinking it just a normal headache...thinking it will just pass by...I didn't sent her to the hospital that night...God...I wish I could turn back the time..

The very morning only I took "Mama" to the hospital. Expecting everything was ok...I waited..."Mama" was being attended by the doctor...I was then busy getting your newly bought cloths...blanket...etc...from home.

Hmmm....13 years has gone. Siti Nur Lisa, we have lost you that day. Mama had a high blood pressure...the reason for her headache...you suffocated because of that.It's Papa's fault...for not taking care of Mama...

For weeks I cried...and cried ...and cried...blaming my self for what had happened until one day...your grandpa told me , I can't see you in heaven if I didn't stop my crying...the tears will prevent me from seing you...and I stop crying there and then...and at that moment I promised to myself...I'll take care of Mama till death do us part.

Siti Nur Lisa...Papa missed you...



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3 comments:

  1. Wow. This post was heart-wrenching. I am so so sorry for your loss. But you have to know that you can't take the blame for what happened. It's no one's fault.
    And yes, be strong for your wife and the rest of your family's sake. Moving on may be hard but it's the only thing that keeps us from going under.

    Thank you for coming by (: And in response to the comment you left me - no. Surprisingly, getting my tongue pierced was relatively painless.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank for your comment...Whoaamello

    ReplyDelete
  3. ades...sedey bro story nie...sorry for ur loss

    ReplyDelete

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